Wait Till You Are A Mom

I told my Mom that she need not worry while I went out for a three day trip with college mates and she replied “wait till you are a mom”

I objected to her objecting about my late night partying and she said “wait till you are a mom”

On the basis of a good interview I decide to move to Bombay and tell her that she need not worry for me, she replied “wait till you are a mom”

And then finally on 24^th Feb 2011 I became a Mom.

The tiny little red bundle with big eyes and a crop of shockingly black curly hair was all mine. My home production as I fondly called her. I was half proud, half awed and half intrigued by this thing that came out of me and yet was a complete thing in its own right.

My pact with my Mom had been that I would carry the baby for nine months and then go back to my job and career while she was responsible for the baby. She had agreed and we had planned the baby.

I went back to work within two months of the baby being born. She was too young to object and I took full advantage of this fact. People asked me if my baby could manage without me and I would reply with pride that she does very well, thank you.

Time flew and soon she was one year old…the baby who couldn’t turn on her side was now taking tentative steps. Soon she was flying around the house with her Didum (my mom) in hot pursuit and I just grinned.

The pact seemed to be going well, my Mom was busy all day and my daughter possibly got more love and care than I would have given.

Couple of months back Mom said she wanted a break and I suggested her to go to Kolkata and visit our many relatives and friends. It is the one thing that always cheers her up. She agreed and I got tickets for them. My daughter too would be travelling since I had office.

I dropped them at the airport and came back home. Making a million plans of doing this and that on the way. Things that usually were left undone cause once home I got caught up in the antics of my daughter.

I walked into the silent house and then a gaping hole opened up in my mind and body.

Suddenly I missed my daughter so much; it was like a physical blow. I had not bargained for this. It wasn’t like I had never been away from her. But in those cases I was the one travelling, she was home with her Didum.

I felt like turning back and going to pick them up right away. I didn’t though.

But suddenly I understood what Mom had meant all these years when she said, “wait till you are a mom”.

The anxiety, the pain, the pleasure, the beauty, the grief that being a Mom brings is so unique that it cannot be explained, it can only be experienced.