My Latest Kick

Life right now is all about kicks. Kicks from management for meeting targets, kicks from family for being totally lazy, mental kicks to myself for forgetting yet another important chore or not feeling up to it and most importantly internal kicks which tell me that someone is alive and kicking and just waiting to make a grand entry the moment its time.

These kicks apart from making me sit up suddenly also ensure that from time to time I am reminded of the change that is me. You don’t understand do you? Well let me try and explain then.

You see I have been variously described as being wild, lazy, dynamic, potential trouble maker, potential peace maker, good friend, spendthrift and more.

What I didn’t know I was going to become is a compulsive moaner, groaner, superstitious, suspicious, crying at the drop of a hat, wallowing in self pity sort of person. I can now manage to scare myself with or about anything and everything.

Yesterday a television ad for Johnsons baby wipes had me in a terror grip. And the fact that two of the wall clocks were not functioning properly brought tears. I woke up thrice at night going over my irrational thoughts and had to really stop myself with quite a few mental kicks from waking up the rest of the household so that they could handhold me over this latest crisis.

This is coming from a person who thought nothing about going on solo holidays to the Himalayas or roaming around the city all night in an attempt to practice her recently picked up driving skills or visiting the red light area just to know ‘what it looked like’.

So there friends you know now how exactly I am feeling – to put it mildly I am on a mad roller coaster ride whose remote control is in the hands of a toddler and I have no way of knowing at which moment the train is going to jump the rails.

There aint that the mother of all kicks ;)